


The Thing That Should Not Be

by lokisfavoriteminion



Category: Satan and Me (Webcomic)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-29
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-03-26 08:32:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3844174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lokisfavoriteminion/pseuds/lokisfavoriteminion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nothing explicit, written for shits and giggles. Pre-established relationship with a new surprise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lucifer the Baby Daddy

Two things came from the night when Natalie first tried alcohol while her father had gone out of town one weekend to a retreat, at Satan’s behest. (”Come on, kid! It’ll be fun, and you don’t even have to leave the house!”) One, she could hold her liquor with the best of them, to an extent. And two, she lost her virginity to the Devil. To Lucifer. To the angel of music, if old tales were to be believed. Without an ounce of protection.

At first, Natalie thought that she was in the clear, because it was right after her period, and that she couldn’t get pregnant because of that. Also, Lucifer was a fallen angel, and really, how compatible could the two species be, anyway? 

Come to find out, they were actually able to reproduce. (Natalie discovered the tidbit about Nephilim in the Bible about the time she discovered herself throwing up at 4 in the morning due to what she thought was a stomach bug.) One trip to the drug store and ten minutes later, and Natalie had her answer. 

She was pregnant with Satan’s child. This had not been high on her list of things to do before she graduated from her local community college, but at least she had a hot baby daddy to help take care of the spawn. But how to tell him? She thought long and hard about it, and then came up with a way. 

A Hallmark card, blank on the inside for her own message, which she wrote: 

_Lucifer,_  
_Falling isn’t the only damning thing you did~_  
_Congratulations on your half-human spawn! :D It’ll be ready in eight or so months! We’re going to have such a fun time!_  
_Love,_  
_Natalie_  
  
_P.S. I’m naming it after your brother. Which one? I’ll let you squirm before I tell you. :D <3_

Satan had not taken the news well, but due to the contract, he couldn’t leave her. Anthea was beside herself with giggles when she found out, and Felix’s mind almost imploded. Anthea helped Natalie to pick out the kid’s clothing, and Felix refused to let ANYTHING happen to the spawn of his master, to the point of following Natalie to school to make sure she came and went safely. 

Natalie’s father had taken the news less well, but he understood how things happen. He was disappointed, but he made sure that Natalie stayed healthy and well-fed, and took good care of his daughter and future grandchild. 

When the child was born, the weather decided to storm and rain heavily, which resulted in the car almost hydroplaning on the way to the hospital. Lucifer seemed to believe that his brothers were trying to kill Natalie in order to prevent this, but he would make sure she arrived safely. Natalie had given up any pretense of tutoring “Stan”, and allowed Lucifer to stay in his preferred “drug dealer greaser” form when he was formally introduced to Nat’s father as Nat’s lover and the father of her child. 

The labor and delivery went well enough, and the child of Satan was born into the world of mortals. He was deceptively cute, with a few tufts of black hair, and chubby, squishable cheeks. Nat held him for a while, and then looked at “Stan”. “You should hold him…he’s your son.” Natalie told him, offering the baby up to the Devil. Lucifer expressed a bit of reluctance, but he took the baby and held onto him gently. The baby was warm, and soft, and smelled like baby powder. Lucifer could feel something warm in his own heart, and did his best to not let it show. “So which brother did you decide to name him after?” Lucifer asked, looking at the tired Nat. “Gabriel. It’s such a lovely name.” Natalie replied, stifling a yawn. “With Alex for a middle name, ‘cause it’s my dad’s name.” “I think Alex Gabriel flows off of the tongue better.” Lucifer suggested. “It’s more lyrical.” “Mm…whatever suits you, angel of music.” Natalie mumbled, falling asleep. “Alex Gabriel it is, then.” Lucifer decided. “It’s…not a bad name, I suppose.” 

Little by little, he didn’t realize, how human that this child would make him.


	2. What's in a Name, anyway?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a paragraph of Lucifer interacting with humans. |D More a drabble than a real chapter...sorry!

“So…have you two picked out a name?” The nurse was overly cheerful, overly friendly. Her name tag said “Karen”, and Lucifer found her an annoying sort, overall. Certainly the type that one would enjoy leading into temptation and watching them crack and break.   
“Yes, we did.” Lucifer replied, holding Alex Gabriel in his arms.   
“Alright. And what would that be?” Karen was holding a clip board, with some sort of paperwork on it.  
“Alex Gabriel.” Lucifer replied. “Last name…uh…McAllister.”  
“Okay. And the mother’s name?” Karen’s pen was scritch scritching across the paper, and Lucifer found it distracting.  
“Natalie McAllister.” Lucifer replied, bouncing Alex a bit.  
“And the father’s name?” Karen was maintaining that same, annoyingly sweet voice.  
“Lucifer.” Lucifer replied. “Just…Lucifer.”  
“No last name?” The name he gave Karen seemed to unsettle her a bit. Good.  
“Did I stutter?” Lucifer stared at the woman, who seemed to shrink back a bit.  
“Right. Lucifer. Okay.” Karen finished writing, and smiled sweetly. “I’ll leave you guys alone for a bit, but there should be a nurse coming by in a bit to take Alex there back to the nursery for a little while.”  
Lucifer grunted in reply, taking a seat near Nat’s bed and watching his son sleep in his arms.  
“I hope you give ‘em hell in the nursery.” Lucifer murmured to little Alex, smirking. “That’ll show these humans some fear.”


	3. An Update

Since it seems that this has gone over well with you all, I will continue this story as its own thing. xD Keep your eyes peeled for "Stan's Adventures in Fatherhood", coming soon!

(I may or may not also post up my original "Adventures in Fatherhood" fic that starred Michael and Gabriel. Or do a bit of a rewrite. Either way, more will be here!)


End file.
